The journey of faith always begins with a call. We see it with Abram in his encounter with a strange voice. We see it with Moses before a flaming bush. We see it with the prophets in all sorts of bazaar theophanies. We see it with Jesus at his baptism. We see it with Jesus’ disciples when he bids them, “Follow me.” The call is given in an irrevocable summoning, but the response can go any sort of way. We are free to say “yes” or to say “no,” to negotiate or maybe even to try to convince God why this is all might be a big mistake. Yet, the call remains, and we are left with choices that will determine the course of our lives…and the lives of those who come after us…for generations to come.
What is it about this call that can cause someone to act so utterly irrationally, so utterly contrary to normal expectations…Like Abram and Moses…Jesus and his disciples? This is, I believe, the mysterious element at the heart of every religion and its most distinctive characteristic. There would be no Hinduism or Buddhism without this mysterious summoning. No Judaism, no Islam, and no Christianity. And neither would there be any monasticism. Every religious movement is ignited by the spark of this numinous, mysterious, existential demand that confronts us…some of us, with such conviction that we seem to be denied a choice in it at all…we are grasped by a God who simply will not let us go, and we are like Peter before Jesus, “Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life.”
And, so, as God woos us along this wild journey of faith with promises of a better future…for lives of greater peace, greater joy, greater justice for all…we learn much about ourselves…and about those with whom we accompany along the way…and the intended maturation process begins. All carefully designed by God, our journey of faith is not about getting there as quickly as possible, nor is it about getting there without ever taking a wrong turn…and it is certainly not about getting there first and leaving everyone else in the dust. Our wilderness wandering is all about learning to discern the true and real value of life from all of the competing values and to learn to find the grace to finally lay all of our idols aside and embrace the one thing necessary alone and, in doing so, discover that the promises of God are actually not in some far distant future like a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow but right here in our midst waiting to be discovered in our moment of spiritual awakening. The divine theophany at our calling, which gave us a foretaste of the promise to come, whose delight is usually obliterated by the squelching heat of the desert sun, is all directed to this…to the trying of our faith to discover a deeper type of faith which no longer finds life’s value in a projected future but in the here and now. Taste and see! There is a paradise in the middle of the vast, barren desert, and we discover that we are now standing on holy ground…and with Jacob we exclaim, “How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God, and this is the gate of heaven.”
“Listen…and you will arrive,” the first and final words of St. Benedict’s Rule for Monks, captures this journey of faith with perfect simplicity and perceptive insight. Listen…and keep listening. Listen deeply with the ear of your heart, for you have a father who loves you and has a promise to reveal to you. Learn to put off the old self with its ears for titillation and gossip and become pure so that you can hear the deep, constant reverberations of divine love. It’s the hearing, that tasting, and these sacred moments of encounter which bestow the grace to let go of the past which so seeks to cling to you and is where you will find the boldness to venture out into an unencumbered freedom where you will find yourself moving in the kingdom of God and not just toward it.
And this is the moment of insight…that moment when all becomes utterly clear and simple. When the life that we lived with a plethora of competing allegiances is reduced to one, and we discover that the one thing necessary is not success, not prosperity, not notoriety; not a good name and not an honorable family; not the freedom to do what we want nor the health and means to do it. It’s not the propagation and of our sacred traditions nor the strict adherence to them. It is only one thing: faith working itself out through love.
One thing that I have grown to appreciate more and more as I have reflected on my life as a monk over these past 15 years is that its integrity depends on its being rooted and grounded in precisely this and nothing else: faith working itself out in love. The monastic vow is exactly that: conversatio: fidelity leading to love. All of the various aspects of monastic life…and there are many behind which we can hide and evade our true calling…they all are assumed in the all-encompassing vow of conversatio morum: fidelity to the monastic way of life which blossoms in love. It is not obedience. It is not stability. It is not celibate chastity. It is not poverty or simplicity of life. It is the commitment of my heart to give itself without compromise to the daily seeking of the face of God, the daily tasting of divine love, and the less romantic but as important daily struggle of humble service which keeps my heart beating with love and compassion and kindness and prevents it from taking refuge in whatever else may serve as a fake imitation of this love, however good in itself. Obedience is not love. Love bears fruit in obedience. Stability is not love. Love bears fruit in faithful stability. Chastity and simplicity are not love. Love bears fruit in chastity and simplicity. Love, love, and love again. This is the vow of a Benedictine monk.
Sometime in the middle of the 12th century, an English monk of immense spiritual depth and intellectual insight and the head of a lively community in the town of Rievaulx chronicled in one of the most beloved of monastic treatises of the Middle Ages the following: “The day before yesterday, as I was walking the round of the cloister of the monastery, the brethren were sitting around forming as it were a most loving crown. In the midst, as it were, of the delights of paradise with the leaves, flowers, and fruits of each single tree, I marveled. In that multitude of brethren I found no one whom I did not love, and no one by whom, I felt sure, I was not loved. I was filled with such joy that it surpassed all the delights of this world. I felt, indeed, my spirit transfused into all and the affection of all to have passed into me, so that I could say with the Prophet: ‘Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity.’”
Aelred would then go on to compare this life of communal love with the kiss of Christ through his allegorical interpretation of the first verse of the Song of Songs: “Let him kiss me with the kiss of his mouth.” The kiss represents the love of Christ outpoured through the Spirit, now binding brother to brother in love. Spiritual friendship in the community of faith is the way that the Holy Trinity is glorified and made manifest. And not only that, it is the way that God continues to live in the world of time and to transfigure it.
In the Gospel of Matthew we hear Jesus call Matthew himself to such a journey of faith leading to love…and we get a glimpse into the heart of his gospel message. Jesus summons and sends to extend his presence of healing and deliverance, to restore justice and peace, and to make God’s dwelling of Trinitarian love among the human race.
My beloved brothers…
We have encountered the divine in the theophany of our calling. Each of us has heard the summons, and we have left all to follow Christ along this monastic way of the Lord’s service. We have committed ourselves by a solemn vow to be faithful along this way: faithful to our God; faithful to our call as monks; faithful to one another. We have each been given a task (some several tasks) in service to God and the community, and many demands have been placed upon our shoulders. A sure sign that our fidelity is true is that these demands are not burdensome but delights, instruments through which our Lord lives in and through us his own faithful love and service. This can only happen if our eyes and our hearts are focused upon the one thing necessary…upon faithful love…not our own but God’s for us. We are not here just to be obedient, to give up our freedom and personal autonomy and desires. We simplify our lives that we may focus them upon that one quality of life far exceeding all others…that which gives meaning and vitality to it. We refuse the kisses of the crowds to receive the kiss of our Christ and to be filled with his Spirit. And when this happens…and when we offer this kiss of faithfulness and love from brother to brother…a community of faithful love is formed and heart is bound to heart and God is glorified.
The call of God is always also a summons. What are we as monastics summoned to do? What is our evangelical imperative? Do we not have one? Have we, as sometimes accused, forsaken it looking up to heaven while the multitudes suffer and hunger for our help? Not at all! Our evangelical imperative is fulfilled in this: in our love for one another. “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” Everything that we do and everything that we are flows from this well of grace…and when we’re doing it well, multitudes find healing and peace.
Brothers, for nearly 150 years the spark of this love that found a place in the heart of our founder has persisted. There have been seasons when that flame was but a flicker and others when it spread to nations far and wide. This love that must burn is now seeking to burn anew in this new chapter in the OHC story about to begin. What a privilege to be a part of this story…this story of faith showing forth itself in love. Let us each receive this burning flame anew, remember our first love in our own calling, nurture it with ardent devotion, and share it with abandon. Remember, there is never a reason to not choose to love. If we choose it over bitterness and over animosity. If we choose it over self-centeredness and self-assertion. If we choose it over personal ambition and personal comfort…then the love of God revealed in the Holy Cross of our Lord Jesus Christ will reign supreme and the peace of God will keep our hearts bound one to the other and the joy of the Spirit will be our witness to a worried and wearied world that Christ is indeed risen over our shadowy existence with arms open wide bidding to one and to all through us, “Come, follow me…and you will find rest.”
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