Holy Cross Monastery, West Park, NY
Br. Josep Martinez-Cubero, OHC
The Third Sunday in Lent - Sunday, March 12, 2023
The period of formation is a time of much learning, but in order for that learning to be possible we have to unlearn things too. We first unlearn our romantic and sometimes distorted notions of monasticism as being a life of deprivation, restriction, or negation, and begin to recognize the life as one of learning to love God, ourselves, one another, and all of God’s creation with our whole being. It is only that love that leads us to be faithful to our profession because it motivates conscientiousness, commitment, responsibility, and diligence, even in the face of great sacrifice. A great mystic of the Order of the Holy Cross, Fr. Alan Whittimore, wrote:
“I have known very many monks and nuns who were successful in love beyond all dreams or imagining. For they have heard in their hearts the whispering of the Perfect Lover. And it has been their deepest passion and their joy to surrender themselves to Him unto death, even the death of the Cross.” To be able to hear this whispering in our hearts we must let go of our illusions, and that is a lifetime process. We are never finished.
In a few moments, you will profess and sign the threefold Benedictine vow of obedience, stability, and conversion of your ways to the monastic way of life. You will promise to live the vow for a period of three years. The postulancy and novitiate periods have given you the instructions and map, and have led you to the threshold. At this profession you are crossing that threshold and joining the rest of your professed brothers on a pilgrimage. Today is not about “making it”, or “arriving”, but about beginning a journey of self-knowledge that will draw you deeper into the mystery that is God. (Warning: often on a journey we encounter detours and turns that don’t appear on the map and were not included on the instructions!) The vow names the core Benedictine values of listening intently, not running away when the going gets tough, and being open to change and transformation.
Obedience is easy to talk about, and very difficult to live, especially when we hear the word no. One of the most excellent explanations about monastic obedience is found in the contemporary reading written by our brother Robert Leo Sevensky of the Rule of the Order of the Holy Cross. It reads:
“While none of us is called to become an automaton, mindlessly conforming ourselves to the practices of the community or the commands of those in authority, we must be careful not to avoid the hard work of transformation that comes from holy obedience. We are to strive to hear God’s voice calling to us through such practices and commands and to give them always the benefit of the doubt, the best possible interpretation, and our willing conformity, especially when it is not absolutely clear that another course of action would be preferable. This does not, of course, rule out consultation, communal consideration, or expert advice. In the end, however, our cooperation and support, even under protest, is part of the gift of ourselves. We will find it helpful in this regard to cultivate a sense of the limitations of our knowledge of even outward matters, and to treasure up instances in which our assured judgement has proved wrong.”
So monastic obedience is not about compliance and conformity so much as it is about deeply listening and cooperating with those in authority so they can fulfill their leadership role with dignity and integrity. This kind of deep listening and cooperation is only possible when we do it from a place of love, and when we acknowledge that we don’t have all the answers. It is love that opens us to hearing the voice of God in others.
Monastic stability means accepting this particular community and Order as our way to God. For Saint Benedict, community is not just the place where we seek God, but the very means by which we find God. Living in community is not simply about cohabiting or being fused in unhealthy ways, but about being self-differentiated as we strive to stay connected.
Chapter 2 of the Life of Saint Benedict by Saint Gregory the Great tells of a time when a young Benedict was consumed with thoughts about a woman he had once seen. Almost overcome in the struggle, he was at the point of abandoning his vocation, but with God’s grace he came to himself. Benedict noticed a thicket of thorns, and flung himself naked into it, rolling and tossing until his whole body was in pain and covered in blood. He was able to conquer pleasure through suffering. Before long the pain that was burning his whole body had put out the fires of evil in his heart.
It is easy to dismiss that bizarre little tale as terribly outdated because of its misguided and unhealthy view of women and of sexuality in general. But a careful look at what it is telling us about what is happening with Benedict can shed an important insight about the role of stability for Benedict. The tale speaks of loneliness and temptation. Loneliness can be a nagging experience in monastic life. It is very easy to avoid its pain by engaging in all sorts of fantasies and escapisms. Benedict throwing himself on a thicket of thorns signifies confronting our pain courageously. It is about sitting with what is uncomfortable, facing the dark moments of our lives no matter how scary or painful they seem, even when it all feels like we are throwing ourselves on a thicket of thorns, or being nailed to the cross.
Vowing stability does not allow us to evade facing the difficult times of our vocation by running away. Instead, we rely on the support of the community to carry us through. As our brother Randy has said: “Crisis is often a prelude to some kind of deeper growth.”
Conversion to the monastic way of life calls for continuous transformation into Christ. As monks we are always in a state of becoming and running into our need for conversion at deeper and deeper levels. But we are not on this pilgrimage alone. We are all in this together. Vulnerability is the key to ongoing conversion and growth. And constantly opening ourselves to others is a vulnerable choice because it means that we will inevitably get hurt by them at times, but the opposite is also true. In community we can experience love at a deep, soulful and trusting level.
So, dear Daniel, you will continue to have some glorious days, as well as some painful days. There will still be some boring days and plenty of average days. But I have been so delighted by your gentle and quiet presence, by your capacity for love that you demonstrate by all the qualities I described earlier- by your conscientiousness, commitment, sense of responsibility, and diligence in doing things for the community when no one is watching. I admire your reluctance to be the center of attention or be in the spotlight. And I have witnessed how wonderfully you thrive in this life, and have noticed your constant effort to surrender. You are on the right path because each component of the vow is an evolving surrender of your whole person to God. As we have often heard our Superior Robert James say, “Surrendering to the fact that we don’t really know anything helps us see that all is mystery and grace. Only such not knowing is spacious enough to hold the God we seek.” I wish you every blessing in your vocation. ¡Que así sea en el nombre del Padre, del Hijo y del Espíritu Santo! ~Amen+
No comments:
Post a Comment